Look, I’m not entirely sure what a chakra is and I’m definitely not sure about anything spiritual or religious or philosophical.

The tenet I try to stick by is “Don’t be a jerk all the time” and even that is too much for me to live up to some days.

So why listen to someone who is so unschooled in all things religious about the Routed Connection 7-course Chakra Dinner? Because this someone interviewed Chef Beth Ann Lyon about it.

Bottom line: Beth Ann is a chef whose name you should know. When she cooks, it’s good. That’s one of her gifts.

She’s worked at many of Oklahoma City’s favorite restaurants, including opening a few and designing menus for others.

• She’s a graduate of the Coach House Apprenticeship Program, which is the gold standard for local culinarians.
• She cheffed it incredibly hard at Kitchen 324, Provision Kitchen and Anchor Down, among others.
• Her latest mercenary gig was helping those wacky kids from The Mule design the menu for the soon-to-open The Press.

As of late, she’s gotten (by her own account) pretty “woo-woo” when it comes to spirituality. The food we eat affects our bodies, yes, but also our souls and the way we connect to the earth and the heavens.

Enter: Chakras. According to the Internet, there are 114 in the human body.

“Every single one affects a part of your life. From your body all the way up into the heavens. The ones you really have to get in line are your first seven,” Lyon said. “This dinner is a crash course.”

So if you know nothing about chakras and would like to learn while eating a delicious meal, Beth has you covered.

Food has given her a platform.

“Going through the Coach House and all my experience in restaurants trained me for this,” she said. “People enjoy my food, but now they can enjoy it on a spiritual level.”

Everything we need to be happy and healthy and have a fruitful life on earth is all around us, she said. We just need to know how. Part of that is figuring out which chakras are blocked and how to unblock them.

“Everybody has a blocked chakra, unless you’re floating through life like Jesus or Buddha or Gandhi,” Lyon said. Blocked chakras impact people on an emotional, physical and spiritual level. The dinner is her way to teach people those connections.

Each course of the meal corresponds to one of seven main chakras.

Root - beet puree with apples, parsnips, clove and cinnamon

Sacral - pumpkin soup with toasted seeds and coriander

Solar - yellow pepper rings stuffed with curried lentils and turmeric

Heart - kale salad with charred broccoli in a rose vinaigrette

Throat - coconut milk with lemongrass, fig and blueberry

Third eye - poppy seed lavender cake with blackberry icing

Crown - a take-home tea to aid in digestion and connect us to the divine

Watch out for another kind of blockage as well, Lyon said.

“If you can’t poop, you’re in f***ing trouble.”

This is all happening at Urban Teahouse (519 NW 23rd St.), where owner Kristy Jennings routinely schools visitors on the healing power of good teas.

Lyon calls Kristy a “rock star” and I can’t really dispute that. She’s also just very nice. Go in and get a matcha latte if you really want to wake up in the morning.

While I might be a ways off from being a chakra believer, I can tell you this: If Beth Ann Lyon is cooking, then I want to be eating.

Tickets for the dinner are available at Routed Connection, as well as other upcoming events in Broken Bow, Lake Tenkiller, Montana and Mexico.